Monday, February 20, 2006

Travelnacky - Woes of a Weary Plane Traveller

The more I travel by plane, the more I realize how much I hate it. It's bad enough that in a post-9/11 world, air travel has become extremely unbearable. Not only do I have to put up with rude airport workers in the security line, I must also put up with the anally-retentive airline workers too. Which leads me to my favorite airline to complain about...Air Canada.

These days, travelling with Air Canada is an experience to be remembered. I would liken it to having someone shove a 10-meter pole up your ass, and trying to see how far up they can get it in. It seems that more and more these days, Air Canada just finds new and exciting ways to suck all of the green out of you, while providing you with less service...guaranteed! Here are some of my top complaints:

  1. Ten-dollar reservations. Air Canada now charges $10 if you decide to make a reservation with a real person. I consider myself to be more tech-savvy than the average person, and I have no problem making online reservations...but sometimes, you NEED to speak to a person to make a particularly tricky reservation. Why should I be charged extra for this?
  2. Fake credit. If I use a credit on a previously-cancelled ticket, it will cost me $30 EACH WAY PLUS TAX (no, you can't use part of the credit to cover the taxes). So all in all, my *FREE* ticket ends up costing me almost $80.
  3. The cost of comfort. If I want a pillow and/or blanket, it will cost me.
  4. Will work for pretzels. On some flights, you only get the crappy pretzels if you have a special kind of ticket. WTF? They're just pretzels!!!
  5. Carry-on hell. Air Canada keeps changing the acceptable weight and size of carry-on luggage. Pretty soon they'll tell me that I'll have to check my purse in.
  6. Overbooking. If I'd wanted flight X over flight Y, don't you think I would've picked flight X over Y? Why should I be penalized for Air Canada's decision to overbook a flight? Every time I get bumped off a flight due to overbooking, Air Canada should get demerit points against it, refund the FULL price of my ticket, AND give me a free trip somewhere. That'll teach them not to treast their customers like 2nd-class citizens.
  7. "Where did my leg-room go?" I'm not all that tall to begin with. So when I get put on a flight where MY knees are touching the seat in front of me, there's something seriously wrong. Stop trying to cram us onto your planes as if we're sardines!
  8. It's all about status. You're only worth Air Canada's time if you have Super Elite status. You can accumulate all of the Aeroplan points you want, but unless you have Super Elite status, good luck trying to use them for that trip to Hawaii in the summer. Speaking of Aeroplan, you can't even get points on certain fares anymore. As a Super Elite, Air Canada will literally kiss the ground you walk on. But until you hit that (and for some of us who don't live out of a suitcase, that ain't gonna happen), good luck trying to get some decent customer service.
  9. Upgrade coupons. Upgrade coupons are like the fruit dangling in front of you, constantly mocking you for not being able to reach. Not only are there different types of upgrade coupons that can be used with different fares, the so-called system-wide isn't even system-wide!!!
  10. Seat reservations. Now I have to pay Air Canada $30 to reserve my seat. What gives? For that, I might was well go to a charter airline for that.
So next time, I won't fly Air Canada. I'll fly WestJet. I may not get any airline points out of it, but at least it's cheaper, and their employees treat me with respect, rather than act like they're doing me a favor by gracing me with their presence.

1 comment:

peter said...

Clearly, you need to getyour own airline, or private jet. Possibly a blimp, with its own set of multi-talented pilot and crew.

I personally prefer the crew on this airline:
The perfect airline.